The Big Skirt

The lack of follow-up Olympic posts is a clear signal that my interest in the Turin Games dropped off the map shortly after making the last post. Final grades? Bode Miller is a total clown, Shani Davis is a baby and Sasha Cohen is a moderate flop. The real answer here is that nobody will care about skiing, speed-skating and figure skating for the next 4 years, so I'm content.

The real news is the war of words between Ken Williams and "Big Bank" Frank Thomas. Thomas has been a whiner for years, complaining about everything from his multi-million dollar contract to his gold-digging ex-wife to his house in Burr Ridge. Now that the White Sox have decided to move on without him, he badmouths the club at every opportunity. KWilliams has had enough and put Thomas on blast this week, telling Sox staffers that if the team ever erects a statue in Thomas' honor, "it should have a skirt on it."

On top of that, Williams told the media that Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf made loans to Thomas. Loans for what? Thomas was making 8 figures a year! I don't know if it would be funnier if the Sox loaned Thomas $100 or $100,000. Either way, I would love it if Thomas' former teammate Albert "Don't Call Me Joey" Belle told the media that Thomas still owes him $20 from their days of hitting Martini Ranch to holler at girls who weren't their wives. Speaking of Belle, he was recently arrested for stalking an ex-girlfriend. Belle was upset that the media was interested in covering his arrest, but not his induction in the Hall of Fame (neglecting to mention that his honors reside not in Coopertown, but in the Louisiana Sports Hall of Fame.)